I know. I know. My words are clumsy. Here is a photo of a common celtic knot pattern to give you a visual and a quote regarding the knot's 'meaning.'
My beloved's journey led him to a jewelry designer in the uk by the name of Vin Bootle. Vin commonly uses celtic designs in his work. And as fate allowed us, (and I do believe that all timing is of essence, destined, not randomized,) we found a few of Vin's pieces at a small gallery in Masham on one of our day trips.
Knotwork patterns are symbolic of life’s journey, an attempt to make sense of the maze of existence. They represent a continuity of life with no beginning and no end, a journey to one’s spiritual center, an inner quest for spriritual rebirth and a pathway to the sacred and divine source.
As soon as I saw the ring, I knew it was perfect. I slipped it on my finger - perfect fit. The gallery owner explained to us that this was not a Celtic design but a Brigantia design - a 6 stranded braid. Soubriquet explained to me a little of the history of the Brigantians, the one tribe that allied itself with the Roman invaders of Brittania. He told me of their fiery leader, a woman named Cartimandua, and her place as one of only two queens written of in Roman historical texts.
I was intrigued by the history and by the queen. Soubriquet recalled reading Daughters of Fire by Barbara Erskine. A historical fictional epic about Cartimandua and the Roman invasion of Brittania.
So I am reading and enjoying a rather rackus romp through the Iron Age history of Northern Britain - home of my beloved Yorkshire and Yorkshireman. If you know Barbara Erskine, then you know her style. She reminds me a bit of Victoria Holt's novels that I read as a teenager: historical fiction, suspense and romance all rolled together.
Now, for my last bit of thread. As I shared in my opening posts, I am in a mental crisis and have been for the better part of this year. Why? I don't know, honestly. So many pieces of thread to weave and braid together. I can list the big three, but the big three have been around for a few years now. And I have asked for your patience, kindness and most of all, kindredship. I need open hearts, encouraging words. But the braid is of my own making and of my own choosing. And therefore, let me be clear, it is up to ME and ME ALONE to find each thread and follow its course; re-weave a new pattern for my life.
I do not think that it was by chance that we found this particular ring, at this particular juncture in my life. And I welcome and love all comments and emails that send encouraging thoughts, inspirational thoughts, or even the occasional kick in the pants that I need. But I know that I have to face these irrational thoughts and fears and conquer them myself. Actually, conquer is not the correct word. I must incorporate my fears, acknowledge the irrationalities, and face my challenges, scared, but with the gumption of my mule-headed self: to try and try again.
Hence, the talk therapy. And geesh don't I wish she'd only charge me a nickel per session !!
So ..... love me. hate me. disown me. or befriend me. I'm on a journey and I need support. Not saviors. Supporters. Remember, I'm a red-headed double dragon ......... i'm trying to get my roar back.