423b2e
423b2e

9.04.2011

an argumentative woman



I've been getting a lot of feedback lately, here on the blogs, that I'm an argumentative woman. If I follow the lexicon of 'argumentative', I find words and phrases such as 'fond or given to argument', disputatious and contentious. Digging a bit further, disputatious leads me to verbal controversy, discussion and debate. Argument suggests oral disagreement, discussion, differing points of view; a process of reasoning; a statement, reason, or fact for or against a point; or a composition intended to convince or persuade. Am I guilty of discussing differing points of view? Do I state reasons or facts against a point? Do I compose compositions intended to convince or persuade? Well, yes, of course I do.

I admit, I am one of those women who enjoys argumentative play. I like batting around ideas, I like playing devil's advocate, I enjoy being tested by someone else playing devil's advocate. I have a tendency to make bold pronouncements, which sometimes are true and at other times are somewhat fictitious, just to get a debate going. Once under way I usually temper my polemic and attempt to be earnest and reasonable, after I've put up a good fight. I like the tussling of language.

I am not mean-spirited, though I can be sarcastic if provoked. Some may call it 'snarky.' I'm not opposed to a bit of snarkiness as long as the intention is not to harm. The key idea here is 'play' and when a discussion gets personal and critical, then I tend to pack up my toys and go home. It's how we little girls learned to play with one another. Boys push each other down, get up, pat each other on the shoulder and go on to play another round. They playfully trade insults. Sometimes my need to be liked gets in the way of my interpreting remarks and I see them as insults - and not the playful kind. It's a girl thing. In person I tease a lot and argue, but I do not like mean confrontation. There IS a boundary, and we all know when we cross it.

So go ahead, call me argumentative. I AM a mule, after all.

xxx

11 comments:

Adullamite said...

I find all women are argumentative. Want to argue about that? Told you so!

goatman said...

I don't know why little girls sticking their tongue out at you or giving you the finger is funny but it is, hilarious. I chuckled and almost lost a mouthful of grape nuts flakes!

I hate to get too testy on other peoples' blogs; it could be akin to standing in someones house calling their kid ugly or insulting the dog. On the other hand,you have given me free reign on yours and I accept the challenge.
I wish our elected "representatives" could follow your logic and example.
Their antics are pathetic, childish, and tiring.

soubriquet said...

Hey, Goatman, some kids ARE ugly, I mean, it would be un-natural not to comment on how like they are unto gargoyles.
As for insulting someone's dog, I make a habit of doing that. Dogs generally handle it better than their owners though. Usually a dog will just yawn at me and go back to sleep.

That finger-kid has just stolen your favourite toy and smashed it. I'd say she's being frank in her opinions, and is unlikely to have a successful future career in the diplomatic corps.

red dirt girl said...

Adullamite,

Then I must congratulate you on surrounding yourself with thoughtful and thought-provoking women who aren't afraid to express their own opinions! You must enjoy such lively companionship.

xxx

red dirt girl said...

Goatman~

I can picture the grape nuts scene and IT'S hilarious. Forewarned is forearmed and I'll shall be looking forward to a few skirmishes. Though frankly, you are so kind, I'm having a hard time imagining you being testy. As for dogs and kids: you can insult my dogs all day, but say one thing about my children and the mama bear in me comes out!

xxx

Adullamite said...

RDG I always enjoy your thoughtful and thought-provoking comments.

red dirt girl said...

And I enjoy yours as well, Adullamite! You make me laugh.

xxx

gz said...

sometimes you get called argumentative for daring to have a point of view, or for refusing to be a "doormat"

goatman said...

Soub,
Time to take your tongue out of your cheek?
No wonder red's dog doesn't like you, you may harbor secret insult.

red dirt girl said...

gz~

you are so right, girlfriend. My little sister and I are both 'opinionated' and have ruffled more than a few feathers in our day: male and female. Sometimes I just 'calls it as I sees it.'

xxx

red dirt girl said...

Ah Soub~

Goatman might have a point there. Shilah knows you don't love her ....!

xxx